Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Sat May 05, 2018 6:04 am

I managed to eat a banana, so I’ll see how it goes.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Sailor Yue (?) » Sun May 06, 2018 4:42 pm

I'm essentially being fucked over by social services. I have to pay a $600 debt ALL ON MY OWN to get into an apartment they're supposed to be helping me get into.
They forced me to break my lease so that's a $6000 debt to be ADDED.
I HAVE TO GET A STORAGE UNIT OR JUST LOSE EVERYRHING IN MY APARTMENT AND my weekend was shit I barely made any money. As it is my apartment is closed out on the 9th and I have no money to get a storage unit or even time because of all these appointments I have to attend.

I'm going to lose all my possessions and I'm on my way to lose the most important thing in my life.

I hate this so fucking much I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I can't get any help on anything

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Kronos (?) » Wed May 09, 2018 2:41 pm

So, I get a call from the same place that rejected me last month, saying they're holding another recruitment drive, etc. and it sounds like I have another shot at the job.

But, to be on the safe side, I get in touch with the HR person (who I know from my internship) and she tell me that it was a mistake and I shouldn't have been contacted again because I didn't meet the criteria of the job the first time.

On the one hand, I don't have to get up at the crack of dawn this Friday anymore. On the other, I'm still in this shitty position where I have a fucking useless bachelor's degree in Computer tech in a town full of tech companies who don't want to train people straight out of college. Worse, none of the places I've applied to for a PART time job have gotten back to me all week. I can't even get hired anywhere
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Thu May 10, 2018 9:26 pm

Even when I do everything “right” and don’t sabotage myself, the universe steps in to shit all over me anyway. I’m tired of that, and tired of everything else.

It’s not like anyone would even notice if I gave up. It wouldn’t make the slightest bit of difference to the world.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by diribigal (?) » Thu May 10, 2018 10:21 pm

I'm sorry about whatever bad luck you've run into recently, but I wanted to let you know that I'm rooting for you, I and plenty others would absolutely notice, and that I hope you call a hotline or something if you need one.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Mr. Big (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 12:02 am

I'm rooting for you, too. You're always there for me whenever I need help, and I always enjoy having discussions on old cartoons and actors.

If you need to speak to a friend I'm there for you.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 2:11 am

Now I feel bad that I acted out and made other people worry. :fluttersmith:

I just don’t know what to do anymore. The bank straight-up ignored my application for an income-based student loan repayment plan, and I still don’t have a job. Even Walmart and McDonald’s turned me down, and that was great for my self-esteem, let me tell you. I’m going to lose my health insurance at some point thanks to the new work requirements on Medicaid, so no more therapy and meds. I had to stop volunteering because phone banking makes me throw up, and that makes me feel like a loser, too. Also, partially responsible in a small way if the country keeps going to hell. My family can’t afford to help me financially, so if/when I run out of deferments and I’m still stuck like this, we’re all screwed if/when I default.

I tried so hard to do everything right, to use every bit of advice and constructive criticism, rewrote my resume a few dozen times, attended free workshops, volunteered, and it didn’t matter. I did the absolute best I was capable of doing, and it’s still not good enough. I’m right back where I was 23 years ago. I’m beating my brains out, doing shit I absolutely hate doing, just to try to keep ahead of total disaster. I’ll never be able to follow my dreams and frankly they’re all dead now anyway.

And I’m mad at myself for feeling bad about this, because I know there’s people doing worse than this, even on this site. Who am I to feel this way?

I want something good to happen for once in my life. Just once. Even if it was just something silly and ordinary like going to the park and having a nice chat with somebody about ducks or something. Or someone liking my shirt. Anything.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perpetual Motion (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 2:37 am

Hang in there, Madeline! I've definitely enjoyed your presence since you've come back to the forums, and I'd definitely miss you if you were gone.You don't need to apologize for having problems. Just because "some people have it worse" doesn't mean that your own issues are invalid or not worth anyone's time. You are just as much worthy of love and support as anyone else, and you absolutely deserve to have happiness in your life. And you shouldn't have to give up on your dreams, either. Even if you can't focus on them, keep them in your mind and work on them in small ways when you can. Just don't give up, whatever you do!

---

On my end, I'm a bit worried that I'm being embroiled in drama at work. In the span of about an hour, I'm pulled aside by two separate coworkers and they talk to me in hushed tones about how awful/lazy the other person is. I guess I'm seen as a neutral party or something? I just want to stay out of it, but if things keep going the way they're going, I might not be able to.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perrydotto (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 2:40 am

I'm traveling at the moment so I can't really write a lot but Madeline, I want you to know that someone saw your thoughts and takes them seriously. They deserve that.

I know how hollow that might sound but you are not a waste and neither is your time on this planet. You bring smiles to people, you have worth, you deserve respect. What the fuck does Walmart know about you and your value?

It's okay things are overwhelming right now. It's not good, but okay. I can't tell you what to do, but I hope you don't give up on yourself. Can you try appealing the student support decision? Can you apply to other places, maybe cast a wider net? One step at a time. You are great, even when you don't feel like it.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 4:47 am

I may be fucked on the loans. My dad told me not to file for taxes for the last couple of years, because I had no income. That’s how they determine your eligibility for repayment plans. I’m so fucking dumb. I sent them a picture of my bank statements but I don’t know if that will work.

I feel sick.

I know it’s not healthy, but sometimes I wish I could just escape, or that somebody could save me from myself and everybody else. It’s not likely, and would lead me into being abused more, most likely, but I kind of feel like I’m at my limits.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by diribigal (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 10:36 am

Madeline wrote:
Fri May 11, 2018 4:47 am
I may be fucked on the loans. My dad told me not to file for taxes for the last couple of years, because I had no income. That’s how they determine your eligibility for repayment plans.
I'm assuming you're in the US. You can file back taxes at any time, and if you owe no taxes there's no direct penalty. (If you are owed a refund, you can only get those from the past 3 years.) So if the bank statements aren't enough, maybe you can just file asap. It's probably free on turbotax for someone with little/no income to report.
I’m so fucking dumb.
If this was even a mistake, I don't think making a mistake means you're "dumb". And either way, if the situation bothers you, I'd recommend just thinking about what you want to do differently next time (check things your father says on the internet?) rather than what you did in the past.
I feel sick.
Take a breather, be good to yourself (e.g. accept that there's nothing wrong with not volunteering right now, especially given all you're dealing with).
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 1:48 pm

TurboTax won’t let me file because my income was below the minimum necessary threshold to file (i.e. I had no income). So I’m at a complete loss at what to do here, other than just let it go and hope for the best.

Who am I kidding, things never work out for the best, or we wouldn’t live in the worst timeline.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by diribigal (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 2:34 pm

Madeline wrote:
Fri May 11, 2018 1:48 pm
TurboTax won’t let me file because my income was below the minimum necessary threshold to file (i.e. I had no income). So I’m at a complete loss at what to do here, other than just let it go and hope for the best.
For filing your taxes, you can just fill out an appropriate form on paper. But I could be completely mistaken.

I wouldnt recommend just letting it go. Even if it's not needed for this bank thing, filing your taxes may have other benefits. I don't really know, though.

I would recommend googling things like "how to file taxes if no income" or "should I file taxes with no income" or "tips for fighting banks on student loans" or whatever other questions you have.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 3:06 pm

diribigal wrote:
Fri May 11, 2018 2:34 pm
For filing your taxes, you can just fill out an appropriate form on paper. But I could be completely mistaken.

I wouldnt recommend just letting it go. Even if it's not needed for this bank thing, filing your taxes may have other benefits. I don't really know, though.

I would recommend googling things like "how to file taxes if no income" or "should I file taxes with no income" or "tips for fighting banks on student loans" or whatever other questions you have.
I filled out a 1040, scanned it, and uploaded the scan to the bank. I’m also mailing it to the Treasury Dept. so I would think that they would have a record of the filing within a week or two.

Edit: was this a good idea or should I have waited for the IRS to receive it?

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 4:21 pm

I really do appreciate the care and help I received, and I’m very sorry for upsetting people and making them worry. Everyone deserves some kind of care and attention, even if they can’t get it.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Mr. Big (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 4:32 pm

Good luck! Really hope that filing back taxes can at least provide some relief in the long run.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 11, 2018 5:26 pm

At least I didn’t owe anything. I won’t get anything back, but there’s now multiple records of me having no income over the last 2 years. So hopefully I can get on the income-based repayment plan now.

I also filed for a 6 month deferment, to hedge my bets a little.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Aria Genisi (?) » Wed May 16, 2018 1:40 pm

On saturday, my car failed to start. I didn't *need* to use it to get anywhere then, so I managed to make do elsewhere and do other stuff until I could get it in somewhere to get fixed. I got it towed, and it got looked at today. From how it refused to start, and how i described what was going on, it seemed that it was probobly a problem with the starter, and i needed that replaced.

Turns out that the engine seized up. The shop I took it to doesn't work on engines, and it would most likely cost a few thousand dollars to get it replaced.

I'm working with my mom to see what exactly my options are, but even still, I'm freaking the hell out. This was probably one of the worst outcomes for the car, I don't have a job atm, and trying to get a job is going to be harder without the car.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perrydotto (?) » Wed May 16, 2018 8:00 pm

Aw geez, Aria, that sucks a lot :fluttersmith:
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Sailor Yue (?) » Sun May 20, 2018 11:29 pm

My life is essentially ruined cuz of this shit in my life

I'm essentially homeless again because I was evicted from the real nice apartment I had. Why was I evicted? I couldn't pay rent. Why couldn't I pay rent? Cuz a large chunk of my money is gas to go to and from a shithole motel in a shithole town.

Fucking dhs and judge wants me to move to this shit hole town and get a job here. They are going to cost mw my job. They want me to do a job I'm not qualified for. I cannot physically do retail, but no one gives a fuck. They don't believe me that no one will hire me

I'm close to actually getting into an apartment actually, but only if I clear a $700 debt to an electric company. Am I anywhere near doing that? No. I cannot maintain more than $200 in my bank account cuz like I said I spend $20 extra a day on a commute.

At the end of this I will probably have this:

No home
No job
No daughter
No friends
No money

Yep by the end of the week I'm officially o n the streets. Not even in a motel room

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Sailor Yue (?) » Mon May 21, 2018 11:06 am

Unless I win several thousand dollars in the lottery ive lost this thing. How the hell else am I supposed. To get into my own apartment on my own no assistant in2 weeks I'm completely screwed and there's nothing I can do

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Wed May 23, 2018 4:12 pm

Oh my God, I am so,sorry.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Momo (?) » Wed May 23, 2018 5:46 pm

I've been unable to take hormones due to a condition with my optic nerves. This has been hard enough to cope with, but now I've just discovered that I have a microtumor in my pituitary gland, and recent tests have uncovered that as a result I'm producing over 3 times the normal amount of testosterone than the upper range of normal for a biological male my age. At this point, they can't even tell me if one is related to the other, let alone what I can do about it.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Wed May 23, 2018 6:50 pm

Oh, honey. :(

:hug:

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perrydotto (?) » Wed May 23, 2018 7:43 pm

Oh jesus that's awful. I really hope you find some more answers on this, at the very least. You're a wonderful woman and I think about you often. I wish I had more than words but I really do root for you so, so much.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Factory Factory (?) » Wed May 23, 2018 8:45 pm

Echoing what Perry said. :hug:
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Sailor Yue (?) » Thu May 24, 2018 9:43 pm

To make matters worse work has been so slow I can't keep more than $200 in my bank account

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Fri May 25, 2018 6:05 pm

My mom had a mild heart attack earlier this afternoon. Thankfully she’s doing okay, and the doctors don’t think any serious damage happened, but shit.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Princess Flufflebutt (?) » Sat May 26, 2018 9:16 am

Holy crap! That is scary! How are you doing? :ohdear:
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Momo (?) » Sat May 26, 2018 2:06 pm

Update on the medical stuff: Because my health card now has "F" on it instead of "M", they had the test calibrated for an adult female; thus my testosterone levels are "normal". It doesn't mean I don't have anything to worry about, but at least my hormones aren't out of whack. It was a lot of worry over nothing.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perpetual Motion (?) » Sat May 26, 2018 2:16 pm

That's good to hear. Glad you're doing okay, Momo. :flutterunsmith:

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Factory Factory (?) » Sat May 26, 2018 5:49 pm

Jegus. Sheesh. Whew.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Sat May 26, 2018 7:11 pm

Princess Flufflebutt wrote:
Sat May 26, 2018 9:16 am
Holy crap! That is scary! How are you doing? :ohdear:
I’m doing okay. Also, the first diagnosis turned out to be wrong. She does have a mild arrhythmia and did need new meds, but it was some kind of muscle spasm that interferes with the arrhythmia and not a “real” heart attack (I had trouble following the explanation but I’m sure it could be explained better). Thank you. :flutterunsmith:

Also, Momo, I’m glad things weren’t as bad as they seemed. :hug:

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Tue Jun 05, 2018 3:56 am

This is only a small thing, but being a caregiver/caretaker takes up way more energy than I thought it would, and I’m having trouble getting enough sleep to be useful in the mornings.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perrydotto (?) » Tue Jun 05, 2018 7:59 am

Madeline wrote:
Tue Jun 05, 2018 3:56 am
This is only a small thing, but being a caregiver/caretaker takes up way more energy than I thought it would, and I’m having trouble getting enough sleep to be useful in the mornings.
Not a small thing at all! Looking after someone is stressful and definitely exhausting. I hope you can find times to take a break, even just a little.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Sailor Yue (?) » Sat Jun 09, 2018 3:02 pm

Courts approaching in less than 10 days. I'm still short on getting into that apartment in shittown. I'm probably going to fail simply because it's apparently my fault I'm not getting hired.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Soft Snow (?) » Wed Jun 13, 2018 12:24 pm

My father just pasted away. I didn't make in time to the hospital to say good bye. I feel broken and weak...
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Perrydotto (?) » Wed Jun 13, 2018 12:28 pm

My condolences, Soft Snow. I'm so sorry.
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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Madeline (?) » Wed Jun 13, 2018 1:05 pm

I’m sorry, Soft Snow.

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Re: Pony Joe's: Post Not-So-Great Things That Happened

Post by Octavia (?) » Wed Jun 13, 2018 2:17 pm

My condolences :fluttersmith:
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