GSM IV

[CorvusCaw]

Whoops, I live in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Basically I need a step by step guide with the forms or whatever, I have no idea what I'm doing or what forms I need or where to deliver them, I (assume) don't qualify for low-income legal help and I don't know how to find normal legal help.

Message me on Facebook when you can. I'll help.

Also Hey everyone else! We've been back in school for two weeks and I've been teaching as myself, and I think it's some of the best teaching I've ever done. There's been slip ups with pronouns and names by students and staff, and a big issue with porting my files over to a New account name, but I've not encountered anything malicious. I've been flooded with students and coworkers complimenting my go-to boots and cardigans. There's one trans boy who has has had a hard time in high school, and I've never seen him smile in the two years he's been here... until last week when he came to see me.

I want to advocate for more educated and intelligent trans people to seek a career in education. I think that trans experiences make us the best teachers, even with cis students. I also sent a letter to my state representative calling for a bill requiring inclusion of LGBTQ people and authors in high school history and literature courses... I heard back this week... It could get taken up by the LGBTQ caucus during the next legislative session (their focus this session is a very-necessary ban on conversion therapy).

I am a hurricane of blue, pink and white and I will bury any village in my path

[Perrydotto]

I am a hurricane of blue, pink and white and I will bury any village in my path

Frame this sentence.

I'm so, so happy for you, Erica.

[Mad Surge]

Kick some ass, Erica

[BeautifulShy]

Okay so I have a question for everyone. Has anyone had a vaginoplasty through Toby Meltzer I had considered getting it done through him for a long while until I saw a news story about him recently so I am wondering if I should go with him when I do get around to having bottom surgery or not go with him. I am leaning towards just getting my hair removal done here in AZ and stay on hormonesand then when I finish with hair removal and school and then move to Portland OR and have Dugi do it if I decide to go that way.

[diribigal]

Toby Meltzer

Has he been hired by another group since Kaiser Permanente fired him a month ago? If not, he may not even be an option.

[BeautifulShy]

Has he been hired by another group since Kaiser Permanente fired him a month ago? If not, he may not even be an option.

I guess he is supposed to be working out of Legacy Health in Portland OR sometime in the future.

[diribigal]

You can certainly make your own medical decisions, but I wouldn't recommend gambling with your personal health by getting operated on by any kind of doctor fired for negligence/malpractice.

[BeautifulShy]

You can certainly make your own medical decisions, but I wouldn't recommend gambling with your personal health by getting operated on by any kind of doctor fired for negligence/malpractice.

Oh I agree. II probably will go with Dugi or Bowers when I get to it.

[CorvusCaw]

Bowers has like a three year waiting list and requires a $1000 deposit before you can even get a consult. Dugi is close to two years and expects you to attend an informational seminar in Portland before a consult. Meltzer is a scumbag, but be patient or be realistic. Also consider the cost of having to stay in town for a week or two after your procedure, if your surgeon isn't local.

Fwiw, Dugi's office was terrible at communication when I contacted them last summer. They very much have the attitude that they're doing you a favor and you shouldn't ask them questions, no matter how much information you have.

[CorvusCaw]

Also hi everyone, this week marks two months of me being 100% out as a transgender high school teacher. It's pretty awesome. I've got a little board where I keep track of which class misgenders/deadnames me the least, and the winners get pizza at the end of the year. Turns out all of my classes mess up far less often than my coworkers do. Transitioning destroyed my friendship with a previously supportive co-worker but otherwise I feel great. I don't need irl friends.

Still aiming for a July surgery date. I had to move my target date up two weeks because we're starting school two weeks earlier next fall. Getting zapped downstairs is awful.

I had to switch insurance companies because All State made it difficult to change the name on my account.

Also a reporter from a local newspaper wanted to write an article on me but as soon as I checked that he was gonna follow the most recent AP guidelines on reporting on transgender issues he stopped responding to my emails. Almost like be didn't want to report on things accurately.

I have so many duster cardigans now... I love them.

[Octavia]

I've got a little board where I keep track of which class misgenders/deadnames me the least, and the winners get pizza at the end of the year. Turns out all of my classes mess up far less often than my coworkers do.

The pizza competition is an awesome idea and it doesn't surprise me at all that kids are better about not misgendering you than the other teachers.

I'm really glad things are going well for you.

[Perrydotto]

You rock, Corpy So much!

[BeautifulShy]

Bowers has like a three year waiting list and requires a $1000 deposit before you can even get a consult. Dugi is close to two years and expects you to attend an informational seminar in Portland before a consult. Meltzer is a scumbag, but be patient or be realistic. Also consider the cost of having to stay in town for a week or two after your procedure, if your surgeon isn't local.

Fwiw, Dugi's office was terrible at communication when I contacted them last summer. They very much have the attitude that they're doing you a favor and you shouldn't ask them questions, no matter how much information you have.

I do have a plan in my mind and I am going to have to be patient with it so I can work with what I have. Right now I am just focusing on my schooling, finishing electrolysis and then finding a decent paying job so I can expidite things with my transition. Then it is a matter of going to college and hoping things are still in place for my transition to continue further. I do have a good support system here irl and online so it is just a matter of getting things done. Also thank you for all this info Erica.

I am glad you are doing so well with everything!!

[Jill]

my own support system is pretty good but as far as any trans-related healthcare goes, i have a little story to tell

last year i was finally able to see a specialist about starting HRT. one time. he told me he just needed blood tests and some evaluation from my therapist, and he got them shortly after. then i came in for a second appointment and the reception desk said he couldn't see me because he's not on my primary health insurance plan. maybe someone here will be able to work out a reasonable explanation for this because i asked basically everyone i talk to IRL. they said it was fhqwgads

my primary insurance has been Anthem Blue Cross for as long as i can remember. it's through my father's employment and is a PPO insurance plan. my secondary insurance is Health Plan of San Joaquin which i have through Medi-Cal

my primary doctor is only able to refer me to the university of San Francisco, which is an ~80 minute drive that i have no way of making. i let my therapist know this and he told me i should be able to get a case manager through HPSQ that could figure things out, and so i did, and she made me an appointment with the aforementioned specialist at a clinic that was local enough to actually arrange transportation to

when my second visit was denied, they told me i needed to be dropped from my Anthem insurance in order for them to properly bill HPSQ or some shit. nobody has managed to give me an explanation for this that makes sense, but i gather that it's verboten for them to bill HPSQ as my secondary while i have Anthem as my primary. yet it's also verboten for me to just say that HPSQ is my primary because private insurance (Anthem) always takes priority over public. the only conclusion i can draw from all this is that i've had a misunderstanding of how secondary insurance plans work; they should be called something like "inactive" instead of "secondary" so people aren't led to believe they actually fucking do anything unless they become primary

at any rate, the case manager at HPSQ got in touch with one of my social workers and apparently said that i should definitely not be dropped from Anthem because HPSQ is expected to lose funding or trans coverage or something in light of Trump meddling with shit. (i didn't really hear the explanation straight from the case manager so hell if i know what the exact reason was) her suggestion was to get a case manager through Anthem and basically repeat the same process, which i did, except my Anthem case manager was still not able to find anyone in-network who's closer than Sacramento, nor have i been able to find a way to make an appointment that far off

long story short, i've spent the last five or so years dealing with paradoxical bureaucratic nonsense and living in the central valley of California with very limited transportation options. all in this vain effort to see someone qualified to prescribe some goddamn hormones

by the way, since i receive Anthem through a family member, i'm going to be dropped from it when i turn 26 regardless

[Mir]

Jill, I think the best advice I can give you is to see if you can find a trans support group in your area.
Because navigating this stuff is ridiculous and beyond frustrating on your own. If you can find a group, there's a good chance they can point you towards a doctor willing to prescribe hormones or one with alternatives for people without insurance.

[minty]

Medical nonsense is a pain in the ass. I can't say anything about trans stuff, but I got shuffled around in the system for years so I was without autism help for a long time. Those nerdos made me, an autistic person, make phone calls to them! They should be ashamed. Just keep at it is my only advice, although I'm entirely in a different country.

I know I should talk to a doctor about gender stuff eventually but it's so hard to find any sort of therapist here, and I'm terrified for a lot of reasons. For one thing, I have no real privacy for phoning and the last thing I want to do is try to explain to people overhearing at work that I have gender issues. And I have a distrust of doctors since every damn doctor I see seems to think I should be having babies, and that one gyno who called my gender issues "sad".

Anyway, I'm pretty sure now my asexuality ties into my gender dysphoria as I've probably mentioned. I don't like being sexualized I guess? It's hard to explain. But mine's the type of body that's always sexualized.

I hope I figure all this out some day. I have a billion other things to worry about, so I can leave it on the back burner a bit, but gender issues keep popping up.


I'm also just bitter because I had to bra shop today and nothing makes me feel more awkward than racks ( ) of bras saying LOOK SEXY SHOW OFF THOSE GODDAMN TITTIES. So gender issues are surfacing badly for me today.

[Perrydotto]

I really hope you can figure things out, Jill and Minty. Dealing with ridiculous obstacles is a massive, draining pain - One that can be worth it in the end, but it's still a massive pain regardless. Really wishing you that some kinda solution crops up.

[Snowfire]

https://www.pinknews.co.uk/2018/03/15/t ... ssion=true

Study that pretty much confirms trans people are born that way. Not that we all didn't know that already.

In the study, it was found that the insula – a region of the brain – had a distinct volume depending on whether it was in the brain of a trans or cis subject. The insula plays an important role in people’s body image, self-awareness and empathy.

[West Filly]

A few bars in my city have been making their loos non gendered. It's great because they've knocked through the wall between the two rooms to make one big space. Also they seem much cleaner. I think there's this sense that the other gender is judging your hygiene standards in this novel situation and that's driving people to be more considerate. Or maybe they just seem cleaner because they've recently been remodeled?

Is this the future? I don't know. I can't say if it's good for everyone.

[minty]

My only objection to gender neutral washrooms is that nobody seems to get that having disposal cans for menstrual products in every stall is important. So many people don't think it is, and smugly say that garbage cans exist, people can just exit the stalls and throw away products in the one garbage can that washrooms have. Never mind that transgender men might still get periods and might be worried about ruining their passing. Or people who ID as other than female but were assigned so at birth. Hell, even cis women might want to deal with them discretely, given how rude people can be about periods.

It's probably a stupid frustration of mine but it's there. I find that periods are ignored in trans discussions a lot.

[Perrydotto]

Nah, not stupid at all. Gender-neutral bathroom doesn't mean that people's physical needs go away, and periods can be among those. I fully agree about the bins.

[Mir]

Well, once again the problem is that to a lot of people, "gender neutral" seems to mean "masculine."

[West Filly]

I'm pretty sure at least one of the places I visited got the bins right.

[CorvusCaw]

I got notification of my surgery date today.

[Perrydotto]

Exciting

[minty]

I hope it's not too far off!

[CorvusCaw]

114 days

[Cthulhu Inc]

Get a train countdown signature thing

[Madeline]

Get a train countdown signature thing

Seconding

Oh hai thread. I used to post a lot as Paperback Writer and Stone Cold Jane Austen and stuff. I’m still around for moral support if anyone needs it.

[Madeline]

You know who has opposable thumbs and is horrible at long-term planning?

<————-

My family never really bought into it when I came out the first time, and feeling a lack of support led to me doing and thinking a lot of unhealthy things. So I got up this morning intending to do my usual routines, and I felt so awful that I somehow ended up having a very long talk with my mother about my gender and sexuality instead. I felt I had to make it very clear that this wasn’t a passing fancy. She said she’s known my whole life, so as usual I’m the last person to be aware of something important

I have no idea where I’m going to go with this, or if I even can go any farther. But I accomplished something (?) so yay for that.

[Perrydotto]

Knowing someone close to you is generally understanding and supportive can be a great boon, and you can be rightfully proud that you opened up to someone. Good job.

[Madeline]

I painted my toenails to celebrate

[Perrydotto]

Hecka cute

[Angry Critter]

Finally made an appointment with my place of birth to have my birth certificate amended and officially change my name to Lynn.

[Perrydotto]

Whoop!!

[BeautifulShy]

Little update on insurance. I contacted Health Choice of AZ and they said they can't switch me over to Health Net until open enrollment happens later this year so I contacted my former hormone doc in Scottsdale and asked if I can get more hormones while I find a new hormone doc and they said they could get another months worth on the patches. So I contacted Health choice and they gave me some OBGYNs which take Health choice and contacted a few and one got back to me and I have an appointment next week on Thursday morning to see what my options are and if she can help me.

I am also going to be starting laser more readily near the end of the month since my electrolysis tech needs to get his hours on the laser so it is going to be half off the price so 50 bucks for 15 minutes of laser. I am going to try and get as much laser done for that lower price. I did a little bit of research on the laser there and it is an alexandrite laser so it is really good for removing the hair over other types of lasers. So combine with the 45 min of electrolysis I should be able to clear things out quicker.

I am also going to march in the Phoenix Pride parade tomorrow morning which is exciting as I haven't really done so before. I am going to try and make the most of tomorrow at the parade and festival tomorrow.

[Cthulhu Inc]

New passport with correct gender came in the mail!

[Mir]

Congrats!

[BeautifulShy]

Yay!!

[CorvusCaw]

Great!