Horse Laughs
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the cookie cry?
Because his mother was a wafer so long.
Because his mother was a wafer so long.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why do zombies go to Subway?
Because they like to Eat Flesh.
Because they like to Eat Flesh.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- theGECK
- People don't "become an adult", they just get too old to be called a kid
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did the buffalo say to his child before leaving for work?
Bison!
Bison!
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a scary female horse?
A nightmare.
A nightmare.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why are spiders good baseball players?
Because they know how to catch flies.
Because they know how to catch flies.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why was Sunday mass canceled? Nun showed up.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- West Filly
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Re: Horse Laughs
I rode my bike for 15 miles and burned about 7000 calories
in the engine
in the engine
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Octavia
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Re: Horse Laughs
How many moths does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two
Two
- ToastGhost
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Re: Horse Laughs
PonyHag714 wrote: ↑Wed Aug 01, 2018 8:31 amThe first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I want to win 10 million in the lottery, just like my dad did!
Your dad won 10 million in the lottery?
No, but he always wanted to.
Your dad won 10 million in the lottery?
No, but he always wanted to.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where does the sun hide at night?
Just keep looking for it, it’ll dawn on you soon!
Just keep looking for it, it’ll dawn on you soon!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where do TVs go for vacation?
Where?
Remote islands.
Where?
Remote islands.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What is the best type of story to tell a runaway horse?
A tale of WHOA!
A tale of WHOA!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the artist get into an argument with the curator at the art gallery?
He wasn't in the right frame of mind.
He wasn't in the right frame of mind.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
You know what really bugs me? Flea markets.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Due to the cabbage crop failure it was really hard to get ahead!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Does an apple a day keep the doctor away?
Only if you aim it well enough.
Only if you aim it well enough.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What does an aardvark like on its pizza?
Ant-chovies.
Ant-chovies.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Supplies!
Supplies!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did Daisy Duck say when she bought lipstick?
Put it on my bill.
Put it on my bill.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?
Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money.
Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why doesn’t Batman like going on nature walks?
He might run into poison ivy.
He might run into poison ivy.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. It's a hardware problem.
None. It's a hardware problem.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Never take a nail to a bar. They tend to get hammered.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the pony put a clock under her desk?
She wanted to work over time.
She wanted to work over time.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How is a golf ball different from a Chevy?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?
Because it was over 90 degrees.
Because it was over 90 degrees.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around?
Dead Siri-ous.
Dead Siri-ous.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What was the biologist wearing on his first date?
Designer genes.
Designer genes.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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Re: Horse Laughs
Holy heck.
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I took my new girlfriend out on our first date to the ice rink. Entry was half price. She called me a cheap skate.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")