Wrestling Thread (a bit less/more embarassing than ponies)

[shotgunbadgerBeing pressed into labor is fun, as long as the work is peppy!]

This is the first time the post Wrestlemania -> Extreme Rules gap has actually been good without it just being 'let's drive the Wrestlemania storyline into the ground a bit more'. I love all the stories going into Extreme Rules.

[Grilox]

That's a great point. The WM->Backlash/WM->Extreme Rules gap has usually been plagued with filler, but this year they seem to be doing much better.

[BartonFink]

Extreme Rules should be fun but why in God's name did they give Brock Lesnar a horrible scripted promo for him to mangle his way through? I honestly just felt bad for him.

Looking forward to see what happens with Sheamus/Bryan in particular.

[Grilox]

Oh gosh, Brock might be able to wrestle great, but he is not very good on the mic.

Speaking of which, Mark Henry seems to have that problem, but only as a heel. When he's a face, his mic work seems much better overall.

[shotgunbadgerBeing pressed into labor is fun, as long as the work is peppy!]

Extreme Rules should be fun but why in God's name did they give Brock Lesnar a horrible scripted promo for him to mangle his way through? I honestly just felt bad for him.

Looking forward to see what happens with Sheamus/Bryan in particular.

That 'interview' he did for London was a great promo but yea, the one from this week was just utterly atrocious.

[BartonFink]

Sheamus/Bryan was excellent and made both guys look great. Punk/Bryan should be tons-o-fun.

Lesnar/Cena was a lot of fun but I was literally blown away when Cena won. Why on Earth would you book Cena to win that match?

[Grilox]

Looks like Lesnar is actually pulling out of the WWE, and that's why. Most likely, Lesnar was originally booked to win before he decided to leave.

Lesnar/Cena was a great match though, Though since they aren't allowed to cause people to bleed on purpose anymore since they went PG, I wonder if that means Lesnar accidentally stiff-armed Cena a few times at the start there.

[BartonFink]

EEeehhh I've seen those reports, I think they're bothering to work the Internet on this one. I'm also willing to bet the "stiff the shit out of me when we go out there" would've been agreed upon by both parties. And yeah I agree, the match was completely badass, but the ending floored me.

The other report I read (and again I don't really trust anyone but Meltzer on this stuff who hasn't given his complete thought yet) is that Lesnar was brought back to give Cena a win after The Rock beat him. If this is true the company really is insane, Lesnar is a huge draw and having him lose (albeit while looking impressive) on day one is...actually I think a PSP poster put it best:

[Yarma]

Dragon Vs. Punk is something I will pay money to see. I will be missing bork laser though, especially if all the stuff about him getting pissed after his match is true.

Side note: watch Smack Down, and watch Ring of Honor.

[Grilox]

Paul Heyman showed up on RAW last monday.

I'm still marking out a little.

[shotgunbadgerBeing pressed into labor is fun, as long as the work is peppy!]

If you don't like Heyman you don't like wrestling

[BartonFink]

WWE would be pretty boring right now if not for Bryan and Punk.

Good thing it's awesome.

[Grilox]

WWE sure would be interesting if it wasn't for bryan and punk.

(No bryan's cool but Punk cannot wrestle and he's a huge jerk and aaaaaa )

Christian's back and he's great. He had a great two matches in the PPV, and is a Face again!!!

Cody Rhodes is still so underrated though gosh.

List of people that need to stop being jobbers:
-Yoshi Tatsu
-Drew McIntyre
-Tyson Kidd
(Edit: The Usos. I keep forgetting the tag division exists. )

List of people that need to wrestle ever gosh:
-William Regal

(Since I missed the Pre-show I'm watching it now on youtube and I discovered something very strange: Even though Booker T bugs the heck outta me on commentary, I still mark out when his theme plays. I think it might be muscle memory help. )

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

I was catching up on WWE again today, and I just finished 05/06's RAW.



...I don't know why I watch wrestling anymore.
Babyface crowd favourite beats up on 40 year old announcer to teach him a lesson about making good points about him being a crappy friend to anyone not Cena. As the main event. And strips him. And covers him in bbq sauce. And then wins DESPITE the heel run in that is supposed to punish the guy for his hubris in stringing out the match.


Be a Star, John Cena.

[BartonFink]

As I said, Bryan/Punk is keeping me alive at this point, and I sincerely have no idea what the finish to the match will be on Sunday. I'm going with my heart to say AJ ends up siding with Bryan to get him the title. Given the 'type' of crowd an NYC show tends to garner, this will then result in a huge YES reaction. It will own.

(Now that I said that, watch Kane win on a double chokeslam on both guys)

Sheamus is cool but his title run hasn't won me over yet; I sincerely hope they elevate Ziggler a bit and, while Big Show is doing some good work, I can't really care about that much. Beyond that...the midcard is kind of a complete dead zone at the moment (Christian/Rhodes and a comedy Santino feud), which isn't helping. Having someone on destroying jobbers duty is fine; having 5 people on it at once is total overkill:
- Ryback
- Clay (they're trending him off at least)
- Sandow (this gimmick is fantastic and hasn't been done in a long time; give him a storyline, fast)
- Cesaro
- Sin Cara

Also blas even if you don't fully catch up on Raw, don't miss the return of Vader on Raw this week. Awesome stuff.

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

Ok, I'll try to stay positive.
Punk/Bryan should be great, even with Kane shoehorned in there. AJ is killing it with her out-crazying Kane.
Ziggler needs to be elevated to the world title scene now (stop jobbing him out, ffs). I hear they might be bringing in Ric Flair to manage him, which would be amazing.
I like Ryback. FEED HIM MORE Smashing jobbers after shitty jobber promos is endlessly funny to me. They need to start making it three on one and so on though, surely that will be too many for him to handle
Sandow is amazing. Promos own. Ring gear owns. 'The Thinker' pinning pose really owns.
Cesaro could be interesting. I like his finisher with the throwing a guy up and uppercutting him on the way down

[Grilox]

So actually the 1000th episode is still going on but...

APA APA APA APA APA!!!!!

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

I am super-duper marking out right now.

[BartonFink]

Raw was awesome, every time they seem slipping into mediocrity lately they pull out something like this.

I'm conflicted on Punk as a heel:
- Turning him somewhat reverses what's basically been 8 months of the strongest non-Cena booking in years (and he looked kinda cheap in the Cena match).
- Punk as a heel is awesome and he could fight The Rock

I'm leaning towards the latter.

Also, Daniel Bryan/CM Punk/The Rock had a segment together on the microphone and Bryan held his own. Bryan still rules.

edit:

[Grilox]

I liked pretty much all of Raw 1000, except for the whole wedding thing.

Best moment of the night though:



(DDP is such a dork. )

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

Ok posting reactions to Raw1000 as it goes along

- Amazing Video package to begin with. All the great, sad and HolyshitwtfareyoudoingWWE moments in one great segment
- NO CHANCE that I won't mark for Vince
- DX teasing us before bringing out the whole gang. No New Age outlaws music but can't have it all. And SANDOW getting a huge rub here. Love it
- Nice little 6man tag match. JR was great on commentary and putting people over like mad. I still don't know who of Jericho or Ziggler they are turning face here but I am so down for this feud
- Err hey Charlie Sheen good to see you found a way to quit twitter yet still get paid for being 'social media'
- HOLY SHIT this was the best skit. Everywrestler in this town is CRAZY!!! And THE HAND?!?!!?!?! (it doesn't really look like it's Mark Henry's... )
- Swagger jobbing to Sonic (former champ ) But DUDE LOVE, wooo.
- No idea who Slick is but he's amazing.
- SWERVED
- VINCE?!?! You're married!
- Holy shit AJ the GM??!! YES YES YES #AJALL!!! D Bry ripping that bouquet to shreds was fantastic
- Punk. Rock. Bryan. All the buys. all of them.
- Bret announcing Christian vs... the miz I laughed.
- MIZ WINS A MATCH HOLY HELL. I approve of this. always been a miz fan.
- Sheen burying Bryan and giving relationship advice
- Heyman verbally murdering people on the mic. HHH stop trying to punch your lawsuits away. It didn't work last time.
- Steph looking good
- HHH overcomes the odds Brock better win at summerslam.
- Heath Slater out to get murdered again. I think this has been my favourite storyline of the past few months
- Lita coming to kill Heath, awesome! she looks incredible, Punk is a lucky guy
- APA HOLY JESUS YES. You'd better run Heath. Man legends HATE Heath Slater.
- Heath went Vertical from that clothesline. Better selling than Ziggler
- I would mark for a Sheen/Bryan feud
- Fozzy?! Oh wait, Fozzie! Liked the Kaientai, woo woo WOO and Spirit Squad
- hahaha they are going to explain EVERYTHING tonight. GTV reference holy shit.
- Kane vs... Jinder Mahal +5? What? Oh, Taker's here, that's more like it, and he's back from his job fighting the ninja turtles.
- Ok so main event. I can see cena losing the cash-in, probably a DQ. Hahaha they were not expecting punk to win that poll. Wait, 10% voted #rockshow? Why?
- Wow make punk look weak why don't you. Cena has him beat twice and kicks out after being KO'ed by Show.
- Ok I take it all back. Punk heel turn on Rock?!?!
- PUNK HEEL TURN ON ROCK

[BartonFink]

Heath Slater is a success story, they should give him the US title (way better than Santino anyway).

That segment would've buried Bryan if he didn't keep up, but he really did a great job keeping up (with The Rock, of all people). I hope he doesn't end up losing to Charlie Sheen.

And while I initially thought keeping Punk's face momentum going was important, it's kinda hard to see where he would go next (face vs face was last Summerslam) since he's beaten most of the credible undercard heels. This could mean he holds the belt for an even longer time, which I'm down with as well.

Heel turn could be good

[BartonFink]

It's my forum and I'll bump threads when I want to

Also it's the ROYAL FUCKING RUMBLE season. Random thoughts for this period in WWE history:
- The roster depth is so much deeper than it was last year, and 2012 was a pretty great year for new talent. The Shield, Ryback, Cesaro, Sheamus & Bryan getting kicked up the card, Sandow, heck even Brodus Clay. Tensai is the notable exception but that was the gimmick's fault.
- Antonio Cesaro is becoming one of the highlights of the whole show, and his original take on the anti-American heel gimmick is awesome.
- Sheamus is a really strong wrestler and he's great when he's allowed to be himself. When he's given overly scripted face promos, he's insufferable.
- I'm rooting for Punk on Sunday, just cause it would be hugely unexpected and would make his hugely impressive title reign even more legit. Also I kinda don't want to see Rock/Cena II; even a triple threat would be fine by me, just not a repeat.
- I still mark out for the Rock, though.
- Alberto del Rio is unexpectedly great as a face; I thought he would suck at it.
- The Miz is unexpectedly awful as a face; I thought he would be good at it.
- 3 hour Raws, even when they're good, are still kind of a chore to make it all the way through. 2 hours is just better.
- Daniel Bryan and Kane has been a lot of fun, but it's time to move on. I hope Bryan gets a match worthy of his quality at this Wrestlemania (highly unlikely, but I would absolutely love to see Bryan/Ziggler for the WHC). Kane will continue to be Kane.

edit: Also Punk just gave a fantastic promo. He's been on fire since the Rock buildup started.

[Twilight"First I'm turned into a princess...Now I'm a WHAT!?I can't catch a break."]

I'm not really into wrestling anymore, but I really used to be into it as a kid. Mostly, the games kept my interest going because they are pretty awesome, specifically the PS2 smackdown and smackdown vs. raw series. I loved making my own people, and making a huge federation of custom made wrestlers all with their own back stories and bios. It was a lot of fun, especially cooping with 2 friends to comp stomp.

Another thing is that I hate Stone Cold because his stupid theme song is constantly stuck in my head forever. Dun dun, do do dee dee, WEEEoooo! Dun dun do do dee dee, WAAwwwwrrrrrrrrr!

[FSinObscure]

I still love the WWE, have since 1999. But the amount of content lately, most of it repetitive and lacklustre just drains all interest in me. Though Mania season always picks me back up.

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

Agreed that 2012 has been a good year for WWE. A lot of new talent has gotten over, the better wrestlers have had some good storylines/moved in good directions and have relied less on the old guard. Even the Diva's matches have been getting better, though the roster is getting fighteneingly small at this point. They're down to like 6 now?
Gonna be hoping beyond hope that this next few months isn't gonna be the setup for "Rock/Cena II - gotta get John his win back", as he no-sold the shit out of his loss the first time, so really why should he even care about beating the rock if he didn't care about losing? And I can't imagine the build to it will be any better/different from last year's mania match, so we'll get retreads or it'll get worse.
I was ready for the Bryan/Kane team to end, but then they brought back Dr. Shelby last week and all was magical delight once more.They just need to make sure they do backstage segments with them more regularly and they'll continue to be an awesome team. Hopefully if/when they do end it, they'll make it worthwhile and feed it into a world title feud, at least for Bryan.

Who do people want to see Taker fight at mania this year? With HHH and HBK done and dusted, where else can Taker go? Rock? Brock? Punk?

[FSinObscure]

If Punk drops the title to Rock this Sunday, then I'd imagine the only route left for Mania is against Taker

[Grilox]

2012 was a bad year because punk is terrible there I said it.

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

2012 was a bad year because punk is terrible there I said it.

Best in the World

[Opposing FarceDon't you smile at my faceSpit on my backDo you kiss your mother with a mouth like that?]

Punk's not dead

[BartonFink]

2012 was a bad year because punk is terrible there I said it.

If Punk drops the title to Rock this Sunday, then I'd imagine the only route left for Mania is against Taker

I tend to agree, and I think that could work fine.

I just kinda hope we don't see Lesnar/HHH 2 tossed in, that was boring the first time.

[Grilox]

Royal Rumble was good, but the final 4 were the worst. Glad Cena won because I'd rather have him win of those four than the others, but Dolph or Jericho (YESS HE'S BACK) would have been better in every way.

Obviously I'm happy about the rock winning, since I can't stand CM Punk, but combined with Cena winning the rumble, I can't help but see Rock vs Cena 2: Electric Boogaloo on the horizon.

Alberto's match was awesome, and he won dirty, but in a Face way somehow. It worked though because if he won clean his feud with Big Show would have died here.

They really should have let the Rhodes Scholars have the titles, so that the title changes hands, because a stagnant tag division is a lame tag division.

Antonio beat Miz what a surprise to no one I guess that's why it was the pre-show.

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

Up until Ziggler got eliminated from the rumble this was shapin up to be one of the better PPVs, but goddamn was the writing on the wall as soon as that happened. The next 2.5 months of wrestling storylines were painfully obviously laid out. Things I hated in this PPV:


- Cena celebrating goofily shouting 'I'm going to Wrestlemania' after his rumble win. Stop it, dude. You have main evented wrestlemania for the last 6 years, you would have done so this year, you can get title shots whenever you want and really you've made a point of showing you're above the title. you did not need a rumble win.
- The overbooked clusterfuck that was the rock/punk match ending. The Punk/Rock match up until the finish was ok... not amazing but ok. Having the SHIELD end up being punk's lackeys after all makes them less credible, and makes punk look stupid for trying to attempt the really transparently obvious and dumb plan. Having them end the match then tease a stripped title really killed the crowd, and then the restart lasted an entirety of 2 moves and then rock wins clean in 30 seconds after being put through a table I think this ending might have even worked had they restarted the match proper and had a good 5-6 minutes of wrestling and had it finish as it did... but spinebuster -> elbow win right after a punk victory makes punk look like a chump to me.
- The future. This was such a predictable PPV. Cena was the only person going into the rumble who had been teased to do well with his '2012 was a bad year, 2013's gonna be my year' stuff, that might have actually made sense had cena ever once sold any of his losses as mattering to him one bit. What this all means for Wrestlemania is pretty much set in stone now. Elimination chamber will have nothing much happen, and Rock will face Cena for 'Once in a Lifetime' II and get his win back and reclaim the title. The title adds nothing to the match, both stars are bigger than it, and we already had this match. Why would Cena care about beating the Rock? He no-sold the shit out of losing the match last year, going from 'this is must-win' 'I cannot lose' to 'Oh well, nevermind, I'm happy rapadoooo!' so why should we care if he wins this time?
- Punk's title reign ending just like that gives him nothing at all to do for Mania, because we know Cena/Rock will be the title match, so Punk's gonna lose again at EC and then what? Get fed to Undertaker? If that match had the title in it people might think that Punk had an actual shot there and it'd have a cool Streak vs Streak build. But nope. No Brock interference means that HHH/Lesnar 2 will almost certainly happen at mania too. gotta give everyone their wins back, after all.

Oh well... Raw Roulette might be fun. Maybe?

[BartonFink]

I'm conflicted, because I really enjoyed the PPV on its own, but the booking is shaping up to be a 'bleh' Wrestlemania card for me (especially after last year).

- The actual Royal Rumble match was pretty awesome, really. I think in terms of keeping things moving, having good spots, little moments for a wide range of wrestlers, this is in the upper echelons in pure match quality.
- I was sort of rooting for Punk, but I didn't mind Rock taking it. I think they left themselves some room to book with "The Shield" interference - willing to bet that was someone else entirely. The match was kind of stilted and awkward - I suspect Rock has some ring rust - but was pretty good nonetheless.

And, like, I objectively know Rock/Cena is a solid business call and they will make money (also, unlike a lot of people online, I don't think losing to The Rock devalues either the championship or CM Punk's specific reign - it had to end somewhere, that's a pretty strong end). But I just can't bring myself to get excited over the all-but-inevitable Rock/Cena 2.

I think Punk/Taker could be fun if built right - given his place in the company, I think there's a slightly higher chance of him winning that Triple H or Shawn Michaels (which is to say "amazingly slim" as opposed to "none").

- I know Daniel Bryan's character, as they've been using him, wasn't seriously in title contention territory as of late, but the win over Rhodes Scholars (in a good match!) and the hints of a breakup during the Rumble (in a good elimination!) tells me that the most likely match for the best wrestler in the company is another Kane match.
- dear holy lord i could care about Lesnar/HHH less please do something anything else

Also Rey Mysterio looked bad out there yesterday. I hope he can keep himself in one piece for Mania, get the Sin Cara/Mysterio match they've wanted for like 2 years, and finally hang it up.

[PerrydottoHow is a pegasus like a writing desk?]

So apparently Paul Bearer died at the age of 58.

Fuck.

He was one of the reasons why I learned to love Wrestling as a kid. Aw damnit.

[blasmeisterIt is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.]

RIP Paul, for real this time. He should be a lock for next year's HOF

[PerrydottoHow is a pegasus like a writing desk?]

It's a damn shame - Just a couple years back, he had finally gotten stomach surgery to fight his obesity and seemed much healthier and happier for it. I had really hoped that would be a permanent improvement. He would have deserved it.

RIP Paul, you were some of the most fun WWE ever had.

[Grilox]

Whaat? But he seemed fine and was making regular appearances places!

[BartonFink]

Bearer was one of the few guys in wrestling that you can't find a bad word about. He got a lot of stuff in his life together (including his weight to an extent) and it's kind of a shame to die so young - his wife died a few years back and he took it pretty hard, perhaps that was a (mild, psychological) part of it.

That being said,