Horse Laughs
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- PonyHag714
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Horse Laughs
What do ghosts play in the school band?
Haunting melodies.
Haunting melodies.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the artist take a sketch pad to bed with her?
So she could draw the curtains.
So she could draw the curtains.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Dong Strongly
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Re: Horse Laughs
what did the grape say to the vine
nothing, grapes don’t talk
nothing, grapes don’t talk
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where is the English Channel?
I don't think we get it on our TV.
I don't think we get it on our TV.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Gloomy Rube
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Re: Horse Laughs
I'll go ahead and repost one of my faves from the old thread:
Early in the evening, Luna and Celestia were sitting in their thrones, working on various administrative tasks. While Luna was concentrating on a particularly complicated bit of Equestrian Law, a portrait of her, that was recently hung over her throne, came loose, falling and hitting her on the head.
Celestia looked up, smiled, and commented: "A striking likeness."
Early in the evening, Luna and Celestia were sitting in their thrones, working on various administrative tasks. While Luna was concentrating on a particularly complicated bit of Equestrian Law, a portrait of her, that was recently hung over her throne, came loose, falling and hitting her on the head.
Celestia looked up, smiled, and commented: "A striking likeness."
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
One tectonic plate bumped into another and said "Sorry, my fault."
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
The future, the present and the past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
A pet store had a bird contest. No perches necessary.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Octavia
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Re: Horse Laughs
Alternate versionPonyHag714 wrote: ↑Sun Nov 05, 2017 8:00 amA pet store had a bird fish contest. No perches necessary.
- Gloomy Rube
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- Gloomy Rube
- I want you to be like a hamster please
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Doctor, I have lettuce sticking out of my ear.
That may be just the tip of the iceberg.
That may be just the tip of the iceberg.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Besides wood, can you name a poor conductor?
The music teacher.
The music teacher.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did one plate say to the other?
Lunch is on me.
Lunch is on me.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Nurse, I think I'm shrinking.
Go see the doctor, and be a little patient.
Go see the doctor, and be a little patient.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do school cheese and the cafeteria chef's nose have in common?
They both smell and they're both runny.
They both smell and they're both runny.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I wrote a tune about a tortilla. Well actually, it’s more of a wrap song.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Gloomy Rube
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Re: Horse Laughs
I'm just going to post here about the back of my cinnamon toast crunch box
it says "What do cows read with breakfast" and then there's a bunch of jumbled words that you have to put together to solve it
I'm not going to do that though, because I know the answer will be "A moospaper"
it says "What do cows read with breakfast" and then there's a bunch of jumbled words that you have to put together to solve it
I'm not going to do that though, because I know the answer will be "A moospaper"
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
One mousetrap, please, and hurry. I have to catch a bus.
I'm sorry, but our mousetraps aren't that big.
I'm sorry, but our mousetraps aren't that big.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
This butter is so strong it could walk around the table and say hello to the coffee.
If it did, the coffee would be too weak to talk back.
If it did, the coffee would be too weak to talk back.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Octavia
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary?
It runs in your jeans.
It runs in your jeans.
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Spike, have you filled the salt shakers?
Not yet...it's hard pushing the salt through these little holes!
Not yet...it's hard pushing the salt through these little holes!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you ever see the Catskill Mountains?
No, but I've seen them kill mice.
No, but I've seen them kill mice.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
When is it easy to read a book in the woods?
When autumn turns the leaves.
When autumn turns the leaves.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Octavia
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the chicken go to the gym?
To work on his pecks
To work on his pecks
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear about Tony The Tiger's murder?
Police suspect a cereal killer.
Police suspect a cereal killer.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I know somepony who plays the piano by ear.
I know somepony who fiddles with his beard.
I know somepony who fiddles with his beard.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
If there are two flies in the kitchen, which one is the cowboy?
The one on the range.
The one on the range.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why are clouds like people riding horses?
Because they hold the reins.
Because they hold the reins.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks.
Because he had the drumsticks.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")