The Round Stable

Hi Coyote! I don't think we've met, but you seem like a nice person, and we'd all be happy to support you here. Have an internet hug!

I am not too familiar with your situation, Coyote, but the callous behavior of that psychologist is off-putting. I am fortunate in that I haven't seen a psychologist in over a decade (this wasn't related to sexual orientation; I didn't know I was bi at the time). I am assuming this is easier said than done, but is it possible to get a second opinion from a different psychologist? Again, I am not familiar with your situation, so I apologize for a lack of definite answers.

I have returned to college myself. It has me quite busy, given that I am doing 14+ hour days between classes and my job. It is quite refreshing, nonetheless. My school does have a GSA, but I have been too busy to attend its meetings. Does your school have a GSA? Perhaps you could look into that.

Hey Coyote; welcome back. Was wondering where you wandered off to. Sorry things have been so tough on you; hope they turn around and good luck with university.

Just got back from my first appointment with my new therapist and she was great!
She was super supportive and accepting and I just have a really good feeling about her.
She told me I could use her office as a safe space to try on clothes. She even mentioned at the end of our session that if I ever wanted to start hormones or any other treatments, she would help support me with that.

Just feeling really happy at the moment.

Yay Mir!

Thank you all

And thats great to hear Mir!

M14Brony wrote: ↑

Thu Mar 06, 2014 9:30 pm

I am not too familiar with your situation, Coyote, but the callous behavior of that psychologist is off-putting. I am fortunate in that I haven't seen a psychologist in over a decade (this wasn't related to sexual orientation; I didn't know I was bi at the time). I am assuming this is easier said than done, but is it possible to get a second opinion from a different psychologist? Again, I am not familiar with your situation, so I apologize for a lack of definite answers.

I have returned to college myself. It has me quite busy, given that I am doing 14+ hour days between classes and my job. It is quite refreshing, nonetheless. My school does have a GSA, but I have been too busy to attend its meetings. Does your school have a GSA? Perhaps you could look into that.

To be honest I want to stay away from any "professionals" for a while, the one I was going to was a free service provided because I attended an art course on a goverment funded place (can't find better words to describe what the place is) but I do want to see what my university has to offer eventually, IF they offer anything.
And I have no clue what GSA stands for, dang language barriers

Gay/Straight Alliance. Basically, a student-run LGBT group.

Coyote wrote: ↑

Fri Mar 07, 2014 1:18 pm

And I have no clue what GSA stands for, dang language barriers

GSA stands for Gay-Straight Alliance. Their mission statement is something along the lines of:

gsanetwork.org wrote:1 create safe environments in schools for students to support each other and learn about homophobia, transphobia, and other oppressions,
2 educate the school community about homophobia, transphobia, gender identity, and sexual orientation issues, and
3 fight discrimination, harassment, and violence in schools.

e: beaten, rats

Oooh I see thanks, yeah I'll definetly check that once my classes start I need to gather the courage to just go and ask, the place I'm going does seem a bit on the conservative side but I hope it's just the looks, besides something LGBT friendly has to be there student wise at least...

Sorry about the lack of clarification on GSA, Coyote. I have been piston from my phone recently, and I only realized you were from Chile when I was on my computer earlier today. Hopefully you will find such a group at college.

Greetings from Thailand!

Today I have free, tomorrow there's a pre-surgical general exam, and then on Monday I'm admited to the hospital, then ferried to the clinic for a consultation, then back to the hospital. I totally made this happen

Eee!

Great to hear, that's fantastic news!

Operation: V-Day is about to commence!

Grats Logicgate!

Ooh, I'm so excited~!
Here's to a speedy recovery!

Yaay Logicgate (I feel weird coming back for it "just in time" )

ShieldedDiamond wrote: ↑

Thu Mar 06, 2014 8:49 pm

Hi Coyote! I don't think we've met, but you seem like a nice person, and we'd all be happy to support you here. Have an internet hug!

I somehow missed this , yeah I kinda "dissapeared" a bit before you joined I think, so yeah and thanks

Walked around a bit with my best friend Ashley (who is amazing~) and found a nice restaraunt with some delicious chicken curry. It catered a little bit to English speakers with several menu items having pictures and descriptions in English. But we're going to have to learn how "rice" is written in thai, because I'm pretty sure that's one of the items WITHOUT a picture.

Also, an email that was waiting for me when I arrived!

My Dad wrote:Alicia,

The silence has been deafening.

I'm sorry I haven't reached out more. Such responses as I have received have made me question whether or not I should be reaching out. But you are always on my mind, in my heart, and in my prayers.

I can't say that I have any peace about the journey you now are taking. Its irrevocability is particularly troubling to me. But I know you know what is right, and I have to hope and trust that what I cannot see, you have seen clearly.

In the midst of all of this, my most fervent prayer is that you will encounter Christ somewhere on this road. Nothing else matters, ultimately. I know He loves you and I will continue to pray that you will allow Him to watch over you.

I love you.

Dad

There are actually several reasons why I haven't been talking with him a bunch recently. One is that he's involved in triggery stuff for my PTSD. Another is that I knew he would be all dramatic and brooding and TORTURED HERO about my surgery. Sooo here's what I sent in reply:

Logicgate wrote:Dad,

For me, this is one of the most exciting moments of my life, and the culmination of a great deal of effort and planning.

I am aware of your internal conflict regarding my surgery, and I wish you well in resolving it.

We'll talk later.

Love,
Alicia

Yeah, no, you rumble into one of the biggest success stories of my life and make it about your inner torment before dramatically resigning yourself to trusting my judgement? Get out, this isn't your party anymore.

I'll unblock him once I'm home again.

Coyote wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 08, 2014 12:51 am

Yaay Logicgate (I feel weird coming back for it "just in time" )



I somehow missed this , yeah I kinda "dissapeared" a bit before you joined I think, so yeah and thanks

No problem, nice to meet you!

I don't know if "I hope you find Jesus" was his way of saying "I hope you change your mind about the surgery", but if it was then fuck him. It isn't about him. As someone who has done a lot of praying over the last week or two, He would be on your side anyway. I mean that Alicia.

Please enjoy yourself while you're there. You deserve it.

Snowfire wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 08, 2014 2:15 am

I don't know if "I hope you find Jesus" was his way of saying "I hope you change your mind about the surgery", but if it was then fuck him. It isn't about him. As someone who has done a lot of praying over the last week or two, He would be on your side anyway. I mean that Alicia.

Please enjoy yourself while you're there. You deserve it.

I don't think it was? It's more directly about me being an atheist and him being a Catholic deacon.

Logicgate wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 08, 2014 2:31 am

I don't think it was? It's more directly about me being an atheist and him being a Catholic deacon.

Wow... I worry about my mom being overly religious at me. Your dad has had practice doing that.

Ya know, until you said something it hadn't even occurred to me as notable that that email basically ended "btw convert to my religion, love ya bye"

And of course, considering Catholicism's views on this matter, that's pretty strongly implying he doesn't support you in this. If he does mean he wants you to convert, that is.

[quote="Cthulhu post_id=54322 time=1394276040 user_id=101]And of course, considering Catholicism's views on this matter, that's pretty strongly implying he doesn't support you in this. If he does mean he wants you to convert, that is.[/quote]

Catholic here, and I support all of you.

It's understandable that someone who believes in an immortal soul would think that the only thing which ultimately matters is securing a peaceful afterlife. I don't read into this any specific religious anti trans sentiment. Yes it is evangelism, and I find that persistent proselytising is a nuisance, but it's not from a bad place. I think beliefs offer many people a lot of psychological and social benefits, and I can understand people wanting to share what works for them. The only thing I dislike about evangelism is its persistence: its ability to not understand that religion doesn't work for me in the same way it works for them. Atheists are sometimes guilty of this, too. Different strokes for different folks, please.

Also, for someone who's weary about what's going on with you, permanent changes will always be too soon. I don't think his sentiments are helpful to you right now. You neither want to encounter christ nor avoid anything that may be irreversible. You are making the changes that you feel you need to live a more fulfilling life. To someone who doesn't believe in an immortal soul, ie myself, I think that's what ultimately matters: your will, and your experience in the limited years of your life.

I like your dad's honesty, but am sad to see that he's not saying much that's constructive from our point of view.
I commend you for your bravery, and wish for a successful surgery with as comfortable a recovery as is realistic.

I'm sitting on my hotel bed and experiencing ALL THE FEELS. I get admitted to the hospital today, then have surgery tomorrow. Then I'll be at the hospital for five days after.

This is actually happening. I don't know if I'll have internet at the hospital, so it might be a while before I post again. But I've got books, and my DS and my friend will probably come to visit. it's not actually super important to me that she does -- I don't want to feel responsible for entertaining anyone while I'm recovering from surgery.

Actually what I hope she does is hang out with the incredibly hot guy on our floor

Then they can both come visit me

Logicgate wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 09, 2014 9:31 pm

I'm sitting on my hotel bed and experiencing ALL THE FEELS. I get admitted to the hospital today, then have surgery tomorrow. Then I'll be at the hospital for five days after.

This is actually happening. I don't know if I'll have internet at the hospital, so it might be a while before I post again. But I've got books, and my DS and my friend will probably come to visit. it's not actually super important to me that she does -- I don't want to feel responsible for entertaining anyone while I'm recovering from surgery.

Actually what I hope she does is hang out with the incredibly hot guy on our floor

Then they can both come visit me

I don't know if this has changed at all Logicgate, but you are still with your wife and boyfriend right? Did they go to Thailand with you, or did they stay in the US?

Snowfire wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 09, 2014 9:33 pm

I don't know if this has changed at all Logicgate, but you are still with your wife and boyfriend right? Did they go to Thailand with you, or did they stay in the US?

Wife and non-binary-identified fianceee, actually. (the three 'e's is a joke about "fiance(e)" being a gendered noun). And yeah, we're sill together. They stayed in the US. We talked about it and it makes a lot of sense for us: my wife has bipolar, and doesn't like the heat very much. Which likely means that at a time when I should be concentrating the last on others' needs, she'd be on a downswing and we'd both be stuck in the same hotel room and it just seemed generally bad.

My fianceee, on the other hand, was working when I made the trip plans and couldn't easily disappear for a month.

The friend I'm here with is basically my best and closest friend (we bought friendship bracelets that say "Drift Compatible", for those of you who've seen Pacific Rim) and who I know is completely capable of looking after herself while I'm recovering, and who will go out and have adventures if I'm being boring, and then will come back and tell me about them! She's also a housewife (actually the occupation she listed on her immigration form!) and so didn't need to take off work for a month, and I also knew she could use some time away and..really, it was just a phenomenally good idea.

Gee, there's nothing fun to do in Bangkok

She'll be fine. The trick will be getting her back on the plane.

Momar wrote: ↑

Sun Mar 09, 2014 10:14 pm

Gee, there's nothing fun to do in Bangkok

She'll be fine. The trick will be getting her back on the plane.

We're not in Bangkok, actually. But the clinic arranges trips all the time for patients, and their patients' guests can tag along for an additional fee. We have a running joke about how I'm oppressing my friend with my anti-cis bigotry, and how she should be grateful to spend time in the high society of trans people before being cast back into the cis-filled darkness.

Actually that last part's funny because it's true. There's a pretty big selection bias towards being awesome here

Man, a gender clinic has got to be a really comfortable and welcoming place to be out.

Best wishes Logic.
Still excited for you!

Logic you're so close, gosh isn't it amazing?

Turns out I will have internet at the hospital! Princess Momar, may I post in this thread while drugged up from surgery? I'm not going to use it as an excuse to shitpost or anything, but my posts may not be up to the rigorous quality control standards that I normally apply.

I'm going to allow this.

This is gonna be awesome. I'm so excited for you, Logicgate!

Momar wrote: ↑

Mon Mar 10, 2014 12:20 am

I'm going to allow this.

Posting while on high levels of morphine seems like fun. After my first surgery, I was seeing pizza on the ceiling.

I'm checked in at the hospital! The wind whistles by the window in a way that would really be quite alarming, were I the sort to be alarmed by it. The beds, both at the hotel and at the hospital have been EXTREMELY firm, but the hotel bed has worked for me. My survival gear includes:
1x Tablet
1x Book of logic puzzles
1x novel
5x Nintendo games (various)
1x Nintendo 3DSXL (pink)
1x Laptop
1x Internet
1x big floppy pink stuffed dog (named "Puppy")

With these I feel well equipped to handle my time here. (I also have some basic toiletries) I am INCREDIBLY excited. By this time tomorrow, the surgery will be done.

Twenty twenty four hours to goooo
I wanna be sedated
Nothin to do nowhere to goooo
I wanna be sedated

Good luck, Logicgate.

I hate hospitals (considering I nearly bled to death when I first had my tonsils out) so I would be climbing the walls in your shoes.

You're gonna do fine and also get some interesting painkillers. If you get Vicodin, it's an interesting experience. You kind of don't care about anything even if you were in extreme pain. It also gave me awesome dreams when I had it during some gnarly root canals.

I was on a morphine drip the night before I had my gall bladder removed. It's pretty much the best thing ever.