Horse Laughs

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PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Dec 18, 2019 7:09 am

Image I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. I can't wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

Mechanical Ape
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Wed Dec 18, 2019 9:23 pm

What do you call a snake that’s 3.14 meters long?

A π-thon.
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 7:21 am

Image Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?

Image Because they spend years at C.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 4:06 pm

:twiright: I’m not saying a word without my lawyer present!
:speakest: You are the lawyer.
:twiright: Exactly, so where’s my present?
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 4:07 pm

:ponder: Just opened a weight-loss website and it asked me if I accept cookies.
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 4:09 pm

:cry: RIP boiled water.

You will be mist.
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 4:12 pm

I hate snakes and worms because they have no feet.

You might say I’m lacktoes intolerant.
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by DaikatunaRevengeance (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 4:12 pm

dohoho
ImageImage Image Image

;) ❤️ :twasnothin: ❤️ :fancyhat:

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 6:46 pm

:good:
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 7:33 pm

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

SUPPLIES!
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Thu Dec 19, 2019 7:38 pm

People who sell meat are gross, but people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Dec 20, 2019 8:14 am

Image What does Santa do when his elves misbehave?

Image He gives them the sack.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Dec 21, 2019 7:41 am

Image Did you know that Santa's not allowed to go down chimneys this year? It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by DaikatunaRevengeance (?) » Sat Dec 21, 2019 8:00 am

:good:
ImageImage Image Image

;) ❤️ :twasnothin: ❤️ :fancyhat:

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Dec 22, 2019 7:35 am

Image What do you call two witches who live together?

Image Broommates!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Dec 23, 2019 8:16 am

Image Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Image Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Dec 24, 2019 8:03 am

Image What kind of camera does Santa use?

Image A North Pole-aroid!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Dec 25, 2019 7:30 am

Image Elves use what kind of money?

Image Jingle bills!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by DaikatunaRevengeance (?) » Wed Dec 25, 2019 7:43 am

hah
ImageImage Image Image

;) ❤️ :twasnothin: ❤️ :fancyhat:

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Dec 26, 2019 7:11 am

Image Why don’t bananas snore?

Image Because they don’t want to wake up the rest of the bunch.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Dec 27, 2019 8:21 am

Image What does that sign say?

:maud: It dosen't say anything. You have to read it.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Fri Dec 27, 2019 2:37 pm

We saw a magician whose signature trick was turning audience members into windmills.

I immediately became a huge fan.
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Dec 28, 2019 8:40 am

Image What’s Thanos’ favorite app to talk to friends?

Image Snap chat.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Dec 29, 2019 8:06 am

Image How did the bird break into the house?

Image With a crow bar.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Dec 30, 2019 7:29 am

Image How did the gardener know his herbs were fully grown?

Image It was just about thyme.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Dec 31, 2019 7:15 am

Image Did you hear that Dracula passed out at midnight on New Year’s Eve?

Image There was a count down.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 01, 2020 8:07 am

Image What do cows celebrate on December 31st?

Image Moo Years Eve.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 02, 2020 8:18 am

Image What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?

Image There’s mushroom for improvement.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 03, 2020 8:01 am

Image I was addicted to the hokey pokey, but thankfully, I turned myself around.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Jan 04, 2020 7:53 am

Image My son came to visit for summer vacation.

Image Did you meet him at the airport?

Image Oh, no. I've known him for years.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Jan 05, 2020 7:36 am

Image My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Jan 06, 2020 7:25 am

Image Don't be worried about your smartphone or TV spying on you. Your vacuum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by DaikatunaRevengeance (?) » Mon Jan 06, 2020 7:27 am

haha
ImageImage Image Image

;) ❤️ :twasnothin: ❤️ :fancyhat:

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Jan 07, 2020 7:18 am

Image What did the paper clip say to the magnet?

Image I find you very attractive.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:57 am

Image Why did the Archaeopteryx catch the worm?

Image Because it was an early bird.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:30 am

Image What happens when fruits die?

Image They get berried!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 10, 2020 8:42 am

Image How do you know a sailor isn’t ready for commitment?

Image They weren’t ready to tie the knot.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Jan 11, 2020 8:05 am

Image What kind of orange juice do fiction writers like?

Image Pulpy.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Jan 12, 2020 8:05 am

Image What do you call a cute donut?

Image Adoughrable!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Jan 13, 2020 8:18 am

Image Why did the ocean break up with the pond?

Image She thought he was too shallow.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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