Horse Laughs

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diribigal
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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by diribigal (?) » Thu Sep 10, 2020 8:04 am

:maud: I lost my broken magnifying glass outside. Now the plot has a loupe hole.

Plots have plot holes, not loopholes.
ImageImageImage Very math.

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Sep 10, 2020 11:03 am

Image Why don't vampires bet on horses?

Image They're afraid of the stakes.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Sep 11, 2020 10:42 am

Image I’m making a documentary series about how to fly planes...I'm currently filming the pilot.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Sep 12, 2020 11:13 am

Image What do you call a place you go to buy evacuation equipment?

Image A flee market.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Sep 13, 2020 11:38 am

:ponder: What do river fish do when they need cash?

Image They go to the nearest bank.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Sep 14, 2020 11:19 am

Image I just opened a deer cloning business...It's for anyone looking to make a quick buck.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Sep 15, 2020 10:47 am

Image What do you call a chicken haunting your home?

Image A poultrygeist.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:11 pm

Image Got an email from Google Earth proudly stating that they can read maps backwards. I thought to myself, "That's just spam."
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Sep 17, 2020 11:39 am

Image Why is it impossible to starve on the beach?

Image Because of the sand which is there.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Sep 18, 2020 11:31 am

Image Did you hear about the huge sale they just had on canoes?

Image It was quite the oar deal.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Sep 19, 2020 12:25 pm

:flutterdear: There was a bad accident at the Air Force base...a jeep ran over a bag of popcorn and killed two kernels.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Sep 20, 2020 11:42 am

Image I just saw my friend trip and fall over with the basket of clothes she just ironed.

Image I watched it all unfold.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Sep 21, 2020 11:24 am

Image My girlfriend gave me a steamed ball of dough filled with meat and veggies. I think she's dumpling me.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Sep 22, 2020 11:36 am

Image Did you hear about that band called Peanut Brittle?

Image Oh, they broke up...
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Sep 23, 2020 11:40 am

Image What kind of clothing do Karens wear?

Image A lawsuit.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Sep 24, 2020 11:32 am

Image What do Homer Simpson and pizza have in common?

Image D'oh!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Sep 25, 2020 11:53 am

:unenthused: A bus full of musicians has broken down on the highway..police have said to expect some lengthy jams.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Mechanical Ape (?) » Fri Sep 25, 2020 4:38 pm

:twonk: Spike, this library is a mess! We ought to be ashamed of our shelves.
Image

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Sep 26, 2020 11:28 am

Image Who can drink a gallon of gasoline and live?

Image Jerry can.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:24 am

Image Why was the cub shy after taking his shirt off at the pool?

Image He was a little bare.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Sep 28, 2020 11:41 am

Image What does a gymnast put on their popcorn?

Image Sommer-salt.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Sep 29, 2020 11:22 am

Image I used to bathe in tomato ketchup...In Heinz-sight, it wasn't the best idea.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Sep 30, 2020 11:30 am

Image Why did the grass cross the road?

Image To get to the other sod.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Oct 01, 2020 11:32 am

Image Did you hear about the pine trees that fought in the forest?

Image It was a pitched battle.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Oct 02, 2020 11:24 am

Image What's a sheep's favourite musical instrument?

Image A ewekulele.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Oct 03, 2020 11:29 am

Image What was the snowman doing with his hand in a bag of carrots?

Image He was picking his nose.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Oct 04, 2020 11:32 am

Image With so many sporting events being delayed or cancelled, one sports TV outlet decided to televise the World Origami Championships.

Image It's on paperview.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Oct 05, 2020 11:29 am

Image To the person who stole my glasses...I will find you, I have contacts!
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Oct 06, 2020 11:47 am

Image What do you call the top part of a dog house?

:vogue: The woof.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Oct 07, 2020 11:50 am

Image Never forget that you're someone's reason to smile...because you're a joke.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Oct 08, 2020 11:47 am

Image Why wouldn't the sesame seed leave the casino?

Image Because he was on a roll.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Oct 09, 2020 11:27 am

Image What is Pac-Man’s favorite cooking utensil?

Image A wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok...
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Oct 10, 2020 1:40 pm

Image Did you hear about Dracula’s castle? They revamped it.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Oct 11, 2020 11:13 am

:evil: My son asked me, "Daddy, why do bees stay in the hive in the winter?" I smiled and answered..."Swarm."
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Oct 12, 2020 12:11 pm

Image What unit of measurement do you use to weigh bones?

Image Skele Tons.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by Octavia (?) » Mon Oct 12, 2020 12:19 pm

:good:
ImageImageImageImageImage

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Oct 13, 2020 11:19 am

Image I saw someone at the grocery store who angrily stabbed a box of corn flakes, and the flakes went everywhere. The person was arrested for being a cereal killer.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Oct 14, 2020 11:50 am

Image Apple software doesn't have bugs.

:bluh: It has worms.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Oct 15, 2020 11:24 am

Image What brand of cereal is the strongest?

Image Mini Wheats, because they’re shredded.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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Re: Horse Laughs

Post by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Oct 16, 2020 11:24 am

Image A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly...and as you can see, they were Wright.
Image ("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")

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