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Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Sep 10, 2020 8:04 am
by diribigal
:maud: I lost my broken magnifying glass outside. Now the plot has a loupe hole.

Plots have plot holes, not loopholes.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Sep 10, 2020 11:03 am
by PonyHag714
Image Why don't vampires bet on horses?

Image They're afraid of the stakes.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2020 10:42 am
by PonyHag714
Image I’m making a documentary series about how to fly planes...I'm currently filming the pilot.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2020 11:13 am
by PonyHag714
Image What do you call a place you go to buy evacuation equipment?

Image A flee market.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2020 11:38 am
by PonyHag714
:ponder: What do river fish do when they need cash?

Image They go to the nearest bank.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Mon Sep 14, 2020 11:19 am
by PonyHag714
Image I just opened a deer cloning business...It's for anyone looking to make a quick buck.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Tue Sep 15, 2020 10:47 am
by PonyHag714
Image What do you call a chicken haunting your home?

Image A poultrygeist.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:11 pm
by PonyHag714
Image Got an email from Google Earth proudly stating that they can read maps backwards. I thought to myself, "That's just spam."

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2020 11:39 am
by PonyHag714
Image Why is it impossible to starve on the beach?

Image Because of the sand which is there.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Sep 18, 2020 11:31 am
by PonyHag714
Image Did you hear about the huge sale they just had on canoes?

Image It was quite the oar deal.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2020 12:25 pm
by PonyHag714
:flutterdear: There was a bad accident at the Air Force base...a jeep ran over a bag of popcorn and killed two kernels.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2020 11:42 am
by PonyHag714
Image I just saw my friend trip and fall over with the basket of clothes she just ironed.

Image I watched it all unfold.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2020 11:24 am
by PonyHag714
Image My girlfriend gave me a steamed ball of dough filled with meat and veggies. I think she's dumpling me.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2020 11:36 am
by PonyHag714
Image Did you hear about that band called Peanut Brittle?

Image Oh, they broke up...

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Wed Sep 23, 2020 11:40 am
by PonyHag714
Image What kind of clothing do Karens wear?

Image A lawsuit.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Sep 24, 2020 11:32 am
by PonyHag714
Image What do Homer Simpson and pizza have in common?

Image D'oh!

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2020 11:53 am
by PonyHag714
:unenthused: A bus full of musicians has broken down on the highway..police have said to expect some lengthy jams.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Sep 25, 2020 4:38 pm
by Mechanical Ape
:twonk: Spike, this library is a mess! We ought to be ashamed of our shelves.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sat Sep 26, 2020 11:28 am
by PonyHag714
Image Who can drink a gallon of gasoline and live?

Image Jerry can.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2020 11:24 am
by PonyHag714
Image Why was the cub shy after taking his shirt off at the pool?

Image He was a little bare.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2020 11:41 am
by PonyHag714
Image What does a gymnast put on their popcorn?

Image Sommer-salt.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Tue Sep 29, 2020 11:22 am
by PonyHag714
Image I used to bathe in tomato ketchup...In Heinz-sight, it wasn't the best idea.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2020 11:30 am
by PonyHag714
Image Why did the grass cross the road?

Image To get to the other sod.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Oct 01, 2020 11:32 am
by PonyHag714
Image Did you hear about the pine trees that fought in the forest?

Image It was a pitched battle.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2020 11:24 am
by PonyHag714
Image What's a sheep's favourite musical instrument?

Image A ewekulele.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sat Oct 03, 2020 11:29 am
by PonyHag714
Image What was the snowman doing with his hand in a bag of carrots?

Image He was picking his nose.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2020 11:32 am
by PonyHag714
Image With so many sporting events being delayed or cancelled, one sports TV outlet decided to televise the World Origami Championships.

Image It's on paperview.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2020 11:29 am
by PonyHag714
Image To the person who stole my glasses...I will find you, I have contacts!

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Tue Oct 06, 2020 11:47 am
by PonyHag714
Image What do you call the top part of a dog house?

:vogue: The woof.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Wed Oct 07, 2020 11:50 am
by PonyHag714
Image Never forget that you're someone's reason to smile...because you're a joke.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Oct 08, 2020 11:47 am
by PonyHag714
Image Why wouldn't the sesame seed leave the casino?

Image Because he was on a roll.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Oct 09, 2020 11:27 am
by PonyHag714
Image What is Pac-Man’s favorite cooking utensil?

Image A wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok...

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2020 1:40 pm
by PonyHag714
Image Did you hear about Dracula’s castle? They revamped it.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2020 11:13 am
by PonyHag714
:evil: My son asked me, "Daddy, why do bees stay in the hive in the winter?" I smiled and answered..."Swarm."

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2020 12:11 pm
by PonyHag714
Image What unit of measurement do you use to weigh bones?

Image Skele Tons.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2020 12:19 pm
by Octavia
:good:

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2020 11:19 am
by PonyHag714
Image I saw someone at the grocery store who angrily stabbed a box of corn flakes, and the flakes went everywhere. The person was arrested for being a cereal killer.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2020 11:50 am
by PonyHag714
Image Apple software doesn't have bugs.

:bluh: It has worms.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2020 11:24 am
by PonyHag714
Image What brand of cereal is the strongest?

Image Mini Wheats, because they’re shredded.

Re: Horse Laughs

Posted: Fri Oct 16, 2020 11:24 am
by PonyHag714
Image A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly...and as you can see, they were Wright.