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Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Thu Aug 29, 2019 8:09 am
by PonyHag714
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Fri Aug 30, 2019 8:30 am
by PonyHag714
Being half man and half horse, he enjoyed being the centaur of attention.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Fri Aug 30, 2019 10:55 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
groan
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Aug 31, 2019 9:00 am
by PonyHag714
What is the difference between a nicely dressed mare on a tricycle and a poorly dressed mare on a bicycle?
A tire.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Aug 31, 2019 12:54 pm
by DaikatunaRevengeance
haha
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sun Sep 01, 2019 8:42 am
by PonyHag714
How does a coniferous tree get ready for a date?
They spruce themselves up.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Mon Sep 02, 2019 8:42 am
by PonyHag714
Why did the old lady make a ton of fish-eye soup?
Because it would see her through the week.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 03, 2019 8:53 am
by PonyHag714
What do you call friends you meet at culinary school?
Taste buds!
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 03, 2019 8:53 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
good
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 03, 2019 9:01 am
by Madeline
PonyHag714 wrote: ↑Tue Sep 03, 2019 8:53 am
What do you call friends you meet at culinary school?
Taste buds!
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Wed Sep 04, 2019 8:25 am
by PonyHag714
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Thu Sep 05, 2019 8:27 am
by PonyHag714
What happens when you buy too much ice cream?
Breyer’s remorse.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Thu Sep 05, 2019 11:02 pm
by Mechanical Ape
What kind of music do ghosts like best?
Sheet music.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Fri Sep 06, 2019 8:10 am
by PonyHag714
Why are pickles so calm?
Whatever happens, they dill with it.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Fri Sep 06, 2019 11:39 am
by diribigal
PonyHag714 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 04, 2019 8:25 am
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
But they wouldn't write public messages with regular oinks, they'd use their hooves. And all oinks are already invisible under normal circumstances. And they don't write messages. And invisible oinks isn't good security since you could just analyze the sound. And inaudible oinks wouldn't be much better as you could still detect it with the right microphone. Someone needs to teach these pigs about the limitations of security through obscurity. Call me when they're doing a Muddy-Hogman Key Exhange to transmit tons of MBs (massively big swine).
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:31 am
by PonyHag714
Did you hear about the rabbit who refused to leave her house?
She was having a bad hare day.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sun Sep 08, 2019 8:51 am
by PonyHag714
When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sun Sep 08, 2019 9:57 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
hah
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Mon Sep 09, 2019 7:36 am
by PonyHag714
I asked a pony if she had a dollar. She said “No, but I have fore quarters.”
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 10, 2019 8:15 am
by PonyHag714
My girlfriend thought I’d never be able to make a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta!
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Wed Sep 11, 2019 8:35 am
by PonyHag714
How do you keep a bagel from getting away?
Put lox on it.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Thu Sep 12, 2019 8:27 am
by PonyHag714
Why couldn’t the fish watch YouTube?
He couldn’t stream the video.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Fri Sep 13, 2019 9:10 am
by PonyHag714
I love my furniture. My recliner and I go way back.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Sep 14, 2019 8:47 am
by PonyHag714
Why should you worry about the math teacher holding graph paper?
She’s definitely plotting something.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sun Sep 15, 2019 8:36 am
by PonyHag714
An amoeba named Max and his brother
Were sharing a drink with each other
In the midst of their quaffing
They split themselves laughing
And each of them now is a mother
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Mon Sep 16, 2019 7:44 am
by PonyHag714
Why do ponies keep asking Celestia to measure things?
Because she's the ruler of Equestria.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 17, 2019 8:27 am
by PonyHag714
Did you hear about the robbery at the Apple Store?
The police are looking for iWitnesses.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Wed Sep 18, 2019 9:04 am
by PonyHag714
What’s a tree’s favorite dating app?
Timber.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Thu Sep 19, 2019 9:11 am
by PonyHag714
How are false teeth like stars?
They come out at night.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Thu Sep 19, 2019 9:14 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
haha
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Fri Sep 20, 2019 8:17 am
by PonyHag714
Why do melons have weddings?
Because they cantaloupe!
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Sep 21, 2019 8:22 am
by PonyHag714
My friend keeps saying "Cheer up, it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know she means well.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Sep 21, 2019 8:24 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
GOOD
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sat Sep 21, 2019 12:19 pm
by ToastGhost
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Sun Sep 22, 2019 8:25 am
by PonyHag714
Doctor, I keep seeing an insect buzzing around me.
Don’t worry; that’s just a bug that’s going around.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Mon Sep 23, 2019 8:25 am
by PonyHag714
My friend keeps telling me to stop pretending to be butter, but I'm on a roll now.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 24, 2019 7:59 am
by PonyHag714
I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I've never looked back since.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Tue Sep 24, 2019 8:36 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
Hah
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Wed Sep 25, 2019 8:19 am
by PonyHag714
How many bugs do you need to rent out an apartment?
Tenants.
Re: Horse Laughs
Posted: Wed Sep 25, 2019 10:08 am
by DaikatunaRevengeance
haha