Horse Laughs
Moderator: Fizzbuzz
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I'm as small as an ant, as big as a whale. I'll approach like a breeze, but can come like a gale. By some I get hit, but all have shown fear. I'll dance to the music, though I can't hear. Of names I have many, of names I have one. I'm as slow as a snail, but from me you can't run. What am I?
A shadow.
A shadow.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
What did one slice of bread say to the other at their wedding?
Let’s grow mold together.
Let’s grow mold together.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Will glass coffins be a success?
Remains to be seen.
Remains to be seen.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Puns about monorails always make for decent one-liners.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
What did the doctor say at your checkup?
I have a bad case of the hives.
I have a bad case of the hives.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear they made an entire book about Teflon?
It has no frictional characters.
It has no frictional characters.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
What does a tea mama say to her kids?
“Goodnight, steep tight.”
“Goodnight, steep tight.”
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Why can’t you blindfold a Pokemon?
Because it’s going to Pikachu!
Because it’s going to Pikachu!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I'm reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is about to happen...I can feel it.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
A courtroom artist was arrested today. The details are sketchy.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
- Posts: 334
- Joined: Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:28 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: FLAVATOWN
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
This year in the toy department, drones are a big hit. They are literally flying off the shelves.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Why didn't the Sun go to college?
Because it already has a million degrees!
Because it already has a million degrees!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
She didn't get along with the gardener. Too rough around the hedges.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
What do you do when you find Niacin and Thiamin at your front door?
You vitamin.
You vitamin.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
When does a boat show affection?
When it hugs the shore.
When it hugs the shore.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
- Posts: 334
- Joined: Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:28 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: FLAVATOWN
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a potato with glasses?
A spec tater!
A spec tater!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
There's a special at the magic shop. Buy wand, get wand free.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I'm an archaeologist and my life is in ruins.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
If a judge loves the sound of his own voice, expect a long sentence.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I'm going to buy some velcro for my shoes instead of laces. Why knot?
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- ToastGhost
- Big adventure's waiting.
- Posts: 399
- Joined: Tue Oct 31, 2017 7:23 pm
- Gender: Male
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and got a ticket for littering.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
- Posts: 334
- Joined: Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:28 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: FLAVATOWN
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Why couldn't the chicken find her eggs?
Because she mislaid them.
Because she mislaid them.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
The butcher walked backwards into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
That arsonist destroyed all my scissors. Shear torcher!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
How do you comfort a grammar fanatic?
Their, they're, there.
Their, they're, there.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
- Posts: 334
- Joined: Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:28 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: FLAVATOWN
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I can't believe they fired me from the clock factory after all the extra hours I put in.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear about the baguette at the zoo? It was bread in captivity.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
- Posts: 334
- Joined: Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:28 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: FLAVATOWN
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
What was the retired dentist's favorite card game?
Bridge.
Bridge.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. It turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
- Here comes the helmet!
- Posts: 317
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2017 11:14 pm
- Contact:
Re: Horse Laughs
You didn’t hear about the three big holes in the ground? Well, well, well.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Princess Flufflebutt
- Nya
- Posts: 312
- Joined: Tue Oct 31, 2017 2:23 am
- Gender: Female
Re: Horse Laughs
PonyHag714 wrote: ↑Fri Mar 20, 2020 8:16 amYou didn’t hear about the three big holes in the ground? Well, well, well.
- DaikatunaRevengeance
- Posts: 334
- Joined: Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:28 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: FLAVATOWN