Horse Laughs
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
When does a horse talk?
Whinny feels like it.
Whinny feels like it.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where do water droplets go to settle arguments?
The Supreme Quart.
The Supreme Quart.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
My kid left some uncooked sausage out of the freezer overnight. When I discovered it, I realized I was dealing with a spoiled brat.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear about the pony who's making model boats in her attic?
Sails are going through the roof.
Sails are going through the roof.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear about the guy who went to prison for smoking herbs?
He's doing time for doing thyme.
He's doing time for doing thyme.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did they call the dog that only barked in deep, gutteral barks?
Subwoofer.
Subwoofer.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Hi, I'm Buzz Aldrin. Second person to step on the moon.
Neil before me.
Neil before me.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Who is the bread God’s arch-enemy?
The Anticrust!
The Anticrust!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What does a painter do when he feels cold?
He puts on a new coat.
He puts on a new coat.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What shampoo does Batman always use?
Conditioner Gordon.
Conditioner Gordon.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a corn cob with only one kernel?
A unicorn.
A unicorn.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
After winning the game I decided to throw my ball into the crowd.
Apparently that’s frowned upon in bowling.
Apparently that’s frowned upon in bowling.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where does a 19th century Russian imperialist get his coffee?
Tsarbucks.
Tsarbucks.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why was the baby corn sad?
He couldn’t find his pop corn.
He couldn’t find his pop corn.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts.
Tweethearts.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear about the insect transport plane that crashed into the duct factory?
Don’t worry, it’s all caught on tape.
Don’t worry, it’s all caught on tape.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
A blue house is made of blue bricks, a pink house is made of pink bricks, a yellow house is made of yellow bricks. What is a green house made of?
Glass.
Glass.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What happens if a cow drinks her own milk?
It goes in one end and out the udder.
It goes in one end and out the udder.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did the lonely ball of dough say?
“No one kneads me.”
“No one kneads me.”
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear that some aquatic mammals escaped from the zoo?
It was otter chaos.
It was otter chaos.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
If you eat two bowls of cereal and they taste the same, what flavor is the cereal?
Synonym Toast Crunch.
Synonym Toast Crunch.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
A police van carrying 12 convicts crashed into a cement mixer.
Click for FullsizePolice are now looking for a dozen hardened criminals.
Click for FullsizePolice are now looking for a dozen hardened criminals.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I asked the librarian where the books on paranoia were.
"They're right behind you," she replied.
"They're right behind you," she replied.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I covered my shirt with push pins...I thought I would look sharp, but everyone said it was tacky.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I got a free fountain drink at the mall today...but all the pennies in the water gave it a bad taste.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I had a great conversation with a dolphin the other day. We just clicked.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
According to Greek mythology, Chiron was a half-human, half-horse doctor.
This made him the Centaur for Disease Control.
This made him the Centaur for Disease Control.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Batman walks into a superhero-only pool, he is quickly stopped by a guard, the guard points to a sign that says:
"No swimming without supervision."
"No swimming without supervision."
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where do bad rainbows go?
Prism.
Prism.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Stay Alert - The Bowling-Alley Killer is still at large...police warn he may strike again.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Telling your suitcase there’s going to be no vacation this year can be tough...emotional baggage is the worst.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
It's the 'Where's Wally' celebration day!
The event is expected to draw large crowds.
The event is expected to draw large crowds.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
My office printer doesn't jelly every time I try to print.
My office printer doesn't jelly every time I try to print.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How does a DNA molecule moisten a stamp?
Helix it!
Helix it!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you give a dog that has a high temperature?
Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog.
Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why does Thor carry a hammer?
Because he already has a thorax.
Because he already has a thorax.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why couldn’t the dragon eat his birthday cake?
He destroyed it while trying to blow out the candles.
He destroyed it while trying to blow out the candles.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the skeleton go to the supermarket?
To get spare ribs!
To get spare ribs!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why does Popeye eat so much spinach?
Because it goes great with Olive Oyl.
Because it goes great with Olive Oyl.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")