Horse Laughs
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I lost track of our Dalmatian puppy...luckily, she was spotted.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did Mr. Potato Head’s dry cleaning service go out of business?
He always used too much starch.
He always used too much starch.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How can photons bend so easily?
They practice light yoga.
They practice light yoga.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a spoiled hot dog?
A Brat.
A Brat.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I’ve been trying to paint my windows...but instead I might just draw the curtains.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I get concerned when a bunch of pigeons start gathering together...I worry they’re arranging a coo.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I'm not going to spread it.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I went to a store that sells door locks for little people...low key, it was pretty nice.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Toad seems so chill when he hangs out with Mario...he’s such a fungi.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Which hand do you use to cut your steak?
Neither, you use a knife.
Neither, you use a knife.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks...I had to sell my car to pay the bill.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's the most sarcastic body of water on earth?
The Crimea River.
The Crimea River.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How does Luke get from one part of Endor to another?
Ewoks.
Ewoks.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How old was the caveman on his birthday?
Stone Age.
Stone Age.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why was the executioner fired?
He didn't make the cut.
He didn't make the cut.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What kind of car does a sushi chef drive?
Rolls Rice.
Rolls Rice.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I’m making a coat out of pancakes...I call it my flapjacket.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I put a "No Flyers" sign on my front door...the next day I was sent two emus and an ostrich.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's the deal with airline food?
The flavors are all so plane, and the prices are sky high.
The flavors are all so plane, and the prices are sky high.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How does a ghost plan his day?
He makes a to-boo list.
He makes a to-boo list.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What’s a cat’s favorite way to gamble?
Scratchers.
Scratchers.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where do math teachers go to vacation?
Times Square.
Times Square.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you get when you rub two oranges together?
Pulp friction.
Pulp friction.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Some shapes got involved in an accident.
The circle got up and looked round, the triangle suffered acute injuries and the square was alright.
The circle got up and looked round, the triangle suffered acute injuries and the square was alright.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Han Solo ordered a steak in the shape of a Wookie.
He sent it back to the kitchen because it was a little chewy.
He sent it back to the kitchen because it was a little chewy.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did Noah have so much difficulty fishing on the ark?
He only brought two worms.
He only brought two worms.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What does a house wear?
A dress.
A dress.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What has four letters, sometimes has nine letters and occasionally has twelve letters?
The mailman.
The mailman.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I just got a job in a factory making plastic Draculas...there are only two of us on the production line, so I have to make every second count.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I’m going to open a pub right next to the court house...I’m calling it The Side Bar.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for books about paranoia.
She whispers, "They're right behind you!"
She whispers, "They're right behind you!"
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What does gold eat to stay healthy?
Karats.
Karats.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
An armed man ran into a real estate office...he shouted, "Nobody move!"
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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What do you call two beetle babies fighting over milk bottles?
A beetle bottle battle.
A beetle bottle battle.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Have you ever heard a Swiss joke?
It's cheesy.
It's cheesy.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What’s Icarus’ least favorite food?
Hot wings.
Hot wings.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How much does a roof cost?
Nothing, it’s on the house.
Nothing, it’s on the house.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How does Curly Howard respond when asked if he wants Chinese food for dinner?
Why Soy-tainly!
Why Soy-tainly!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What is a librarian's favorite thing to grill during the summer?
A shhhhh-kabob.
A shhhhh-kabob.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's the best kind of triangle to ask out on a date?
Acute triangle.
Acute triangle.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")