Horse Laughs
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a fruit that studies the night before a test?
A cram-berry.
A cram-berry.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Cutting down a tree with a block of cheese is easy.
You just gotta make sure it's extra sharp.
You just gotta make sure it's extra sharp.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
As a slice of stale bread, I used to hate mold...but it's growing on me.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I bought a bag of bird seed almost 2 months ago...anyone know how long it takes for the bird to grow?
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What happened to the two apple trees that were planted together?
They lived appley ever after.
They lived appley ever after.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's a ships favorite drink?
Anything, as long as it's not on the rocks!
Anything, as long as it's not on the rocks!
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I opened a fresh loaf of bread and found a baseball card wedged between two slices...It was a Catcher in the Rye.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How do Disney princesses screw in a lightbulb?
They hold the bulb in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them.
They hold the bulb in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did Mars ask Saturn?
“Hey, can you give me a ring some time?”
“Hey, can you give me a ring some time?”
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
The machine at the coin factory just suddenly stopped working, with no explanation. It doesn’t make any cents.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I used to hate when I accidentally ate seeds...but recently, they've been growing on me.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- DaikatunaRevengeance
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a owl that is good at science?
Owlbert Einstein.
Owlbert Einstein.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why was Pavlov's dog's fur so soft?
Because it was conditioned.
Because it was conditioned.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- Mechanical Ape
- Not slim, definitely shady
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Re: Horse Laughs
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
- Mechanical Ape
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Re: Horse Laughs
My uncle the soldier endured pepper spray and mustard gas.
He's now a seasoned veteran.
He's now a seasoned veteran.
- DaikatunaRevengeance
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- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a snakeskin suit?
A hissy fit.
A hissy fit.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's Medusa's favorite cheese?
Gorgonzola.
Gorgonzola.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do workers in a tea factory never get?
Coffee breaks.
Coffee breaks.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How did Tommy feel when his toothpaste landed on the floor?
Crestfallen.
Crestfallen.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
My son only knows the first 10 letters of the alphabet.
Turns out we sent him to a pre-k school.
Turns out we sent him to a pre-k school.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
A guy was admitted to hospital with 8 plastic horses in his stomach.
His condition is now stable.
His condition is now stable.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What did the water filled ice tray say to the the freezer?
Hey buddy...do me a solid.
Hey buddy...do me a solid.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Sonny and Cher are playing scrabble. Sonny draws a tile out of the bag and Cher asks him what he picked.
He replies "I've got U babe."
He replies "I've got U babe."
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a female horse that refuses to work while the sun is up ?
A Nightmare.
A Nightmare.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I accidentally drank a jar of invisible ink...I'm now at the hospital waiting to be seen.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What do you call a family that gives a pipe organ to the church?
Organ donors.
Organ donors.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
I know a person who jumped through a window without getting hurt.
They said it was paneless.
They said it was paneless.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
When my girlfriend is sad, I let her color my tattoos.
She just needs a shoulder to crayon.
She just needs a shoulder to crayon.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
How ironic, a tornado tore through Miss Oklahoma's vegetable patch the day after she was crowned Miss America.
She actually got whirled peas.
She actually got whirled peas.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's a superhero's favourite holiday destination?
Cape Town.
Cape Town.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Did you hear the one about the roofer with a perfect safety record?
He never had a shingle accident.
He never had a shingle accident.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
When we were kids, my brothers and I would race to put our shoes on every morning.
It always ended in a tie.
It always ended in a tie.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
To get to the other slide.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Why do dentists never lie?
Because the tooth always comes out.
Because the tooth always comes out.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night.
Oof.
Oof.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
What's a six-letter word that means a false feeling of accomplishment?
Wordle.
Wordle.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")
- PonyHag714
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Re: Horse Laughs
Where do pirates buy their hook hands from?
From a second hand shop.
From a second hand shop.
("Don't try to reform me, Hag, because I'm made of cold stone.")